The Son of a Preacher Mam

The son of a Presbyterian minister wrote me a note and asked me if I would read his "common essay" for applying to universities this year. He is a nice kid, and he is smart and has much to recommend him. But he has a flaw. He either is, or he seems to be, arrogant. He wrote an essay about an experience he had had at a religious retreat, and how, protected, white, privileged, he fell silent among others in the group, thinking he might not have much to share, since they were less sheltered than he had been. Some of them had experienced hardships he would never see. Only years later he decides how much he actually knows and had to share, a day late and a dollar short. The problem is, he is still the same person, slightly evolved, but still aloof and more full of his own wisdom, part of the narcisism of senior year in high school. I am afraid that the College Admissions reviewers will read his essay as a superficial treatment by a glib young man of an interesting topic. I have tried to suggest that he rewrite the piece, but expect that my comments may not be very well received. Having once been 18 and just as conceited, I am sure, I suspect my attempt to help will be rebuffed and my self and opinion to be reviled. A bit later, I am surprised pleasantly to learn that he agrees with me, at least on the InterNet, characterizing his essay as a bit "dickish." Interesting choice of words, thought I. He never showed me his final draft, however. In another forum, we debate the service of offering to write and edit application essays. It is common practice today, but has ethical complications, not the least of which are economic ones. Who can pay for the best services gets in, it would appear. The world is filled with people who want an inside track, an edge, with people who, in the extreme, cheat. The issue points out the difference between academe and the "real" world, between playing by the rules and no holds barred competition. It is an interesting issue to consider, even while opting to go ahead and hire a service, or offer your services to those who demand them.